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Fugitive Monkeys and Cuffin Season Playbook

November 13, 2024
Comedian Glory Mora shares her Cuffin Season playbook, WhatsApp chisme gets fact-checked, police hunt 43 monkeys that escaped from a lab, Daylight Savings switch throws us off, Voyager 1 finally gets reception in space, and our Dominican man tries a new ranch tub at Burger King.
Show transcript
00:06
What's up y'all? Welcome back to me too.
00:08
Daily. I'm Alejandro and I'm Jenny and we're wearing the
00:12
same outfit for three shoots straight.
00:14
We haven't changed. I would say we're a little bit sus
00:17
the budget is tight y'all.
00:19
I'm sorry. It's tight guys like it is tight.
00:22
So please keep watching our viewers need to go up.
00:27
But before we get into today's show,
00:30
we actually have a little reminder and that is that we are
00:33
brought to you by the Mitu newsletter.
00:35
So sign up at we are meu.com.
00:36
Stay up to date on me to news events and more and
00:39
now let's get into it.
00:41
OK. This story for all my whatsapp users.
00:44
So basically all our Tias moms,
00:48
Theos, Primos and Aguas,
00:49
right? Yeah. So tension especially the ones in Mexico,
00:54
they're in our motherland.
00:55
So look, they're rolling out a feature that connects you straight
00:58
to Google's reverse image search,
01:00
right? It's a tool to help you check if an image
01:02
is legit or if someone's playing with Photoshop to make it go
01:06
viral. So they're adding an Anti Chisme feature,
01:13
Damia, you're going to have to come with some receipts to
01:16
the chat. You're not smarter than Google.
01:19
Exactly. So it's like it's,
01:20
it's own personal fact checker for photos.
01:23
So kind of like on,
01:24
you know, Twitter slash X,
01:25
they have community notes like now you can check if that sketchy
01:28
pic has been shared somewhere else.
01:30
It's giving you some context right inside the whatsapp app.
01:34
Where was this? When that Peso my haircut photo came
01:38
out. We were all,
01:40
we ate that shit up.
01:41
I thought it was real.
01:43
It was not real,
01:44
not the first black and white picture of it.
01:48
We ate that shit up.
01:50
Complicated that. But anyways,
01:52
but look, it's not perfect just because it shows up in
01:54
the search doesn't mean it's always,
01:56
you know, more info,
01:57
but it's a start with all the misinformation going around on media
02:01
and it's just like good to have a basic way to just
02:05
kind of do a little check in check in.
02:07
This is right. We'll just have to see,
02:10
see how legit the feature is.
02:12
But it should be good,
02:14
especially with all this A I stuff coming out,
02:16
man can't even tell what's real and what's not.
02:19
I mean we got duped.
02:20
So yeah, we did,
02:22
they, they, they freaking dropped by yo face on us
02:26
because we got, we got,
02:28
we got all right space junkies.
02:30
NASA has confirmed. It has received a message from an interstellar
02:33
traveler that's more than 15 billion miles away from earth.
02:37
And the message was good news and it wasn't from et 15
02:42
billion miles away and still sending messages.
02:46
That kind of sounds like an annoying ex-boyfriend brother Yikes.
02:50
Well, this ex boyfriend is actually Voyager one and he had
02:53
everyone sweating. Last month,
02:55
the spacecraft went dark trying to turn on the heater mission control
02:58
here on earth, waited for its usual check in and got
03:01
ghosted. Oh, yeah.
03:03
The heater. Right.
03:04
It's cold up there.
03:04
It is. I can only imagine so.
03:07
Voyager one that uses backup radio transmitter that hasn't been used since
03:10
1981 to send a message back to earth,
03:13
which engineers picked up,
03:15
you know, what could have avoided this?
03:17
He could have took Cobija San Marcos maybe two maybe.
03:24
And you're good. But my guy is almost 50 years old
03:28
and 15.4 billion miles from earth holding on for dear life.
03:34
But still checking in.
03:35
You see, you never get too old to check in brother
03:38
There's no excuses if he wanted to.
03:40
He would. Anyways.
03:42
Now they're working to get Voyager back to normal.
03:44
But let's be real.
03:45
It's explored four planets,
03:46
right? 48 moons.
03:48
And it's currently speeding through interstellar space at over 38,000 MPH.
03:52
Dang, might be time to let Voyager retire.
03:56
But on another note,
03:57
why can't they make products that last this long on earth?
04:00
You know, like my guy up in space,
04:02
dealing with all the space elements and still kicking while I'm on
04:07
my eighth pair of airpods.
04:08
Damn dude. Eight man.
04:11
But even though it has a few watts of power left each
04:13
year, NASA hopes that Voyager will keep going until 2025 or
04:17
beyond. But the closer it gets,
04:19
the more cautious they have to be as Voyager project manager says
04:23
every move now is a big deal.
04:25
Props to the engineers man.
04:27
Like I'm just glad it's not like the submarine.
04:31
Oh, yeah. Props to these engineers.
04:33
Cheers to Voyager. The little spacecraft that's still got a little
04:37
fight. And damn brother,
04:39
how much daylight we gotta save.
04:41
Like I'm sick and tired of this.
04:43
I know it's a time of year when I start Asian to
04:45
go home at 3 p.m. You know,
04:46
that sounds like a good EOD you know,
04:48
the extra hour of sleep like it's cool for the first night
04:53
you know, but once Monday morning come around,
04:55
your girl was fried,
04:57
especially after this weekend,
04:58
rough night, rough weekend,
05:00
brother. Well, studies say that daylight savings time might be
05:04
messing with us way more than we think.
05:06
Researchers from the University of Oregon just found that the spring forward
05:11
part isn't just rough for a day or two.
05:13
It actually throws off our productivity for up to two weeks.
05:16
So let me get this straight.
05:18
It takes two weeks to adjust.
05:20
That explains a lot.
05:22
Also Halloween brother, Halloween,
05:25
daylight savings and the election all in the same week and the
05:29
Daughters Parade. But yeah,
05:31
so much happened. It got me moving like a dam Abu
05:36
Like, it's just too much,
05:38
too much for us to handle now.
05:39
Well, since there is actually one solution you could go to
05:42
Arizona, like, move there or Hawaii,
05:45
they don't do the whole time switch anymore.
05:47
But what the hell are we still doing it?
05:49
Because we voted for it.
05:51
Honestly. Maybe it's time we pack up daylight savings like this
05:56
one time all year,
06:01
block the clock, the clock.
06:04
Let's do it. Well,
06:05
I mean, what do you think?
06:07
Do we keep it or do we ditch it?
06:08
Let us know in the comments.
06:10
A police search is underway after 40 monkeys escaped from a research
06:15
facility in South Carolina on Wednesday night.
06:19
That's Cuarenta Changos that are on the loose pinches mono Cesca Paon
06:25
Police in YCB four county said the animals escaped from Alpha
06:28
Genesis. A business that provides nonhuman primate products and bioresearch services
06:34
according to its website.
06:36
So in a way this is good because it's,
06:38
yeah, they escaped the lab testing and stuff.
06:39
Brother. Isn't this?
06:40
How like planet of the Apes started?
06:43
What research was being performed on them?
06:45
Is this another virus outbreak?
06:47
What is going on?
06:49
Hey, sister, you know,
06:50
it's ok. I heard that residents are strongly advised to keep
06:53
doors and windows secured to prevent these animals from entering homes.
06:57
What are Jumanji going on?
06:59
That's what I was saying.
07:00
I was like, relax.
07:01
And I was like,
07:01
no, this is actually kind of crazy.
07:02
So the Sheriff's department said that anyone who finds a monkey should
07:06
not interact with it,
07:06
but instead called 911.
07:09
No, I'd be like,
07:09
behind the window, like,
07:13
be like, shout out to me.
07:19
But what is a cop going to do?
07:21
You're going to call 911 and they're going to call animal control
07:24
and then it's like,
07:24
bro, let me just talk to him,
07:26
let me just talk to him.
07:29
I don't know. Well,
07:30
we wish the monkeys nothing but the best and guys stay safe
07:35
because they actually are pretty dangerous.
07:36
They're pretty dangerous. But I'm so glad they escaped.
07:41
That means if you hear this run last game,
07:45
help us welcome comedian Loreli Mora.
07:52
Thank you. Oh my God,
07:53
you guys really made me feel like a star over here.
07:55
You are a star.
07:57
I'm really trying to get into my talent.
07:59
It's like a mindset to be talent because I'm Dominican,
08:02
you know. So I'm just so used to working and showing
08:05
my love and myself through service and I need to relax and
08:08
be talent. So,
08:10
do you feel like that sometimes as a Latina woman?
08:13
Yeah, I do.
08:13
I feel like it's all eyes on me.
08:16
And I'm like, oh,
08:17
you know, you look really good.
08:18
The last time I saw you had just up brown.
08:21
Yes. So you went dark girl.
08:23
I went from a sad to be.
08:25
Let's go. Let's go.
08:27
Right. So, is it because of Scorpio season?
08:30
You're a Scorpio? I'm a Scorpio.
08:31
I'm actually excited for the Scorpio season.
08:34
Scorpio represents death, rebirth and death.
08:37
So, a lot of the times you never feel like the
08:39
end of the year is coming,
08:40
you're getting your life together.
08:41
You're declutter, you're cleaning out your apartment,
08:44
you're blocking your exes.
08:46
That's representative of the Scorpio season.
08:49
Like you're just making room for new energy.
08:52
So it gets a little dark.
08:53
That's why we're black today.
08:55
Do you look at you?
08:56
I wear black because I'm having a funeral for the person.
09:01
The mistakes I made earlier this year.
09:02
I like that. So I wanted to ask you,
09:04
how do you avoid your exes during the holidays?
09:07
I don't, I just honestly,
09:09
I feel like every culture is a little different and something that
09:13
I love the most about my Dominican culture is that we don't
09:16
really ever let our exes go.
09:19
Is that, is that just me or does that happen in
09:22
your culture as well?
09:23
I mean, I don't think so.
09:26
I think in our culture,
09:29
for example, my parents are separated but my dad,
09:32
he's been going playing Dominoes on my mom's side of the family
09:35
for over 30 years actually,
09:37
because you get close to the family.
09:39
Yeah, it's just something that we acknowledge.
09:41
Even when my ex came to visit in New York,
09:44
we went out to smoke hookah my mom was there.
09:47
No, he's not the guy,
09:49
but it's just part of the culture.
09:51
So I don't really avoid my exes and I actually hit up
09:53
one of my exes.
09:54
We broke up a year ago and I just wanted to check
09:56
in on him just literally like as a friend,
09:58
as a friend, as a friend.
10:00
Do you think that I'm dumb for that?
10:02
There's no feelings there.
10:04
I don't know their feelings there.
10:06
I'm a Gemini. I don't know.
10:09
I think you can be friends with the next.
10:12
I don't want to be like,
10:13
that's a thing. Friendship.
10:14
That's a hard question because it's like,
10:16
I don't want to talk to you every day.
10:18
That's a boyfriend. We can talk once a year.
10:21
That's a, that's ok.
10:22
Do you have guy friends?
10:23
I do. Yeah.
10:24
But it's not like I wouldn't say they're like,
10:26
super close. But I do have,
10:28
I have jean and I have Lee,
10:30
they are people that they may or may not work here and
10:33
I talk to them like,
10:34
once a year. It's amazing.
10:36
We have to have one good conversation and then that's it.
10:38
You got to move on from your ex at some point.
10:40
Of course. Is this something about Christmas that makes you want
10:43
to be like, hey,
10:44
this is true. But you know what the wise words of
10:47
Steve Harvey? He said,
10:50
he said you can't park a new car in the driveway if
10:56
there's an old one sitting there.
10:58
I don't like that quote because if you have a big enough
11:02
driveway you can have a smoke.
11:05
But Steve Harvey has a big ass house.
11:07
No, but like this was back in the day when he
11:09
was ok. We,
11:10
we need to update the quote but I see,
11:13
I like the, I like the,
11:14
I mean, I'm sorry,
11:16
I feel like I'm feeling bad about it.
11:18
Are you linking up with any of your exes during the holiday
11:20
No, no,
11:22
no, no. I think,
11:22
I think I, I'm moving forward.
11:25
Ok, so you're moving that car in reverse?
11:27
I was trying to move you in the back.
11:29
You, you change the gear.
11:30
This is a very nice car.
11:32
What kind of car?
11:33
I would say it's a Porsche.
11:34
A por oh oh my God,
11:43
I need to, I don't,
11:45
I just, I am having a hard time attracting a luxury
11:48
bear. So I really,
11:50
I really be having the Mazdas and Hyundai Mazda.
11:53
Hey, but the Hyundai are coming up.
11:55
Did you see the,
11:55
the way they, they,
11:56
they're doing them all futuristic.
11:58
I don't want a Hyundai.
12:01
What car do you want?
12:02
I want a Porsche.
12:04
That's just what he said.
12:07
That's your, that's your problem.
12:10
OK. No, but I think that when you get
12:13
the message, I think there's nothing wrong with responding if you're
12:15
single but don't be thirsty and put it through chat GP T
12:20
so I'll be like,
12:20
hey, my ex just sent me off plea.
12:22
Is this fucked up GP T?
12:25
Yeah, I put yes,
12:26
I'm like, please respond to this message sounding logical like I
12:30
have moved on but keep it original and it does it for
12:34
you. No way.
12:35
Where do you go for that?
12:36
Oh Shit. Let me tell you my life has gone together
12:40
So I'm low key feeling the pressure of cuffing season.
12:44
Do you have any advice for that?
12:46
And then if you can explain what cuffing season cuff season.
12:50
So I didn't know this when I was younger,
12:52
I was always finding it weird that around the,
12:54
I would always get a little boy around November and then March
12:58
he would start a weird argument and leave and I was
13:01
like, but it kept happening year after year.
13:04
So you know how men have sports and they'd be doing shit
13:07
during sports like drafts or whatever the fuck.
13:10
Not everyone that starts off in the cuffing season makes it to
13:14
the playoffs. I just got into sports a week ago.
13:18
So I'm learning the language but you get it.
13:20
I'm not making it to the playoffs this year.
13:23
I'm not even drafted.
13:24
I decided not to participate this cuffing season necessarily mean that it
13:30
ends. The woman usually doesn't know that it will end because
13:35
she's so naive and believes in love.
13:37
But the man always knew he was going to leave.
13:40
Oh, shit. I hope that doesn't happen for me.
13:42
It would be like the,
13:44
it's like someone steals a Porsche and she said,
13:47
what a baby stealing cars in L A baby stealing cars and
13:52
Catalan converters. Well,
13:53
thank you so much Gloria for coming on and give her a
13:56
round of applause. Thank you for having me.
13:59
I always have a great time.
14:01
Thank you. And then I see that you've been booked and
14:05
busy on social media tomorrow.
14:07
Do you have anything coming up?
14:09
Yes. So I have a show with my best friend Sasha
14:11
You know, I talk about it all the time.
14:13
So we have a Moiso Indo Comedy show in partnership with the
14:16
New York Comedy Festival.
14:17
We're really excited about that.
14:20
And yeah, we're going to be doing the show on
14:22
November 17th. Tickets are already on sale and we're probably gonna
14:25
sell out because that's usually what?
14:27
No, you guys are gonna sell out.
14:29
You guys are gonna sell out.
14:30
So that's what's happening.
14:31
And then yeah, you gotta come to a show.
14:34
We gotta fly you out.
14:35
Oh my God, I would love that.
14:37
I miss le let's fly her out.
14:41
So that's what we have going on.
14:42
So don't, oh Thank you so much.
14:44
Glory. My love.
14:48
This is what's up Jenny Alejo.
15:07
So I'm here at Burger King.
15:08
Check out this tub of ranch that they just dropped and
15:12
I'm about to cop it and see what's up,
15:13
man. Can I get a whopper?
15:21
And can I get the tub of Yeah.
15:24
Have people been buying them or no?
15:26
The, the ranch,
15:26
the ranchos. No,
15:27
Nala tamo Riro. Kma Kma Lena Ranch Canta Cantina,
15:34
right? This is for like eight people.
15:36
Gracia. I don't even feel OK eating this shit in public
15:40
bro. Like we might have to take,
15:42
we might have to take this shit on the go,
15:43
bro. So there's only one way to eat this ranch and
15:46
it's out of the public eye.
15:49
Here we go. The big dip,
15:51
100 and 20 calories,
15:52
seven servings per container.
15:54
So it's 840 calories with this bad boy if you managed to
15:59
finish it, which is honestly impressive as hell.
16:10
It's definitely ranch. All right,
16:11
let's get to it.
16:15
This is insane. Way too much ranch.
16:24
Why would you need this?
16:27
Yo, it's not bad.
16:29
But yo you eating one of these Lord of the ranch?
16:31
Make sure you're next to one of these bad boys.
16:34
That's where you're gonna end up.
16:35
I hate judging people but like I kinda already know how you
16:38
look if you're ordering this shit,
16:39
I'm done, bro.
16:40
For real. My stomach hurts.
16:42
Can I throw this away?
16:43
Now? I can't even walk away.
16:46
I gotta