00:00
So my dad used to send my mom Serenata and he would
00:04
like, like they used to live like a little far from
00:07
each other and he would literally go all the way over there
00:10
on a bus to go see her like una morai true love
00:15
I mean, my dad literally used to spend his whole
00:17
minimum wage paycheck just to send my mom letters,
00:21
handwrit all the way from here to Colombia.
00:24
And now all I get is a story like a story like
00:28
just a not even a double tap,
00:31
just one click. I mean cancel story like bring back courtship
00:36
Where is it? Where is the energy?
00:38
I want that. Just laziness.
00:41
It's lame. It's boring.
00:44
Anyways, I saw this video of Antoinette from at a money
00:48
talks talking about this exact same problem and we wanted to get
00:53
her thoughts on this.
00:55
Hi, Antoinette. I I love song.
00:59
Thank you so much for coming on.
01:01
I saw your video and I was like,
01:03
dude facts. Latinos are going to die out if young Latino
01:07
men do not learn how to court.
01:09
I just got back from my Latino event and a guy was
01:11
chatting me up for about five minutes and then he pulls out
01:14
oh, if you give me your number,
01:15
you might get a free dinner,
01:16
sweetie. My foundation costs more than the 20 $30 dinner that
01:20
you're offering me. Do you know how your mama got with
01:22
your poppy? Because he wooed her.
01:24
Maybe he got her food.
01:25
Maybe he got her flowers.
01:26
Maybe he sang to her.
01:27
He offered something. We want to be courted.
01:30
We want to be wooed,
01:31
bring back dowries. Even if you don't have money.
01:34
Show effort, actions,
01:35
actions speak louder than words.
01:37
Don't say you like me.
01:38
Show me you like me.
01:39
Thanks just like repost.
01:42
Well, silent repost because I didn't want to make it too
01:45
loud. But this is me.
01:48
So are, are you disappointed in Latino men these days?
01:51
I think the short answer is yes.
01:53
I think there is a lot of effort and attention that I
01:57
know that it is in our culture and I think they're capable
02:00
of. I just don't know why they no longer want to
02:05
continue that effort because romance is a part of our culture.
02:08
So the fact that we're not continuing or we have decided to
02:11
continue romance, I think is really sad.
02:16
Do you think social media has led to the downfall of romance
02:21
I don't think the downfall but I think social media gives
02:23
us the solution of options and makes it really easier to communicate
02:28
So rather than having to send a carrier pigeon or a
02:31
love letter, people can just slide in your D MS.
02:35
So that contributes to this idea of like,
02:38
oh, like, because it's so easy to reach out to
02:40
someone I like, maybe I don't have to put in as
02:44
right, like you can slide in somebody's D MS kind of
02:46
date and you can show up to the date with a Ramo
02:50
make it intentional or you can ask them like,
02:52
oh, what is your perfect date?
02:53
Like what would you,
02:54
where would you like to go?
02:55
What would you like to do?
02:56
So I don't think social media has to be the downfall of
03:00
intention and effort and I think that's what romance is.
03:02
Definitely. And I feel like it's like our dads,
03:05
they kind of set the bar pretty high and I'm just kind
03:11
if you don't do that the way my dad talks about my
03:14
mom and looks at my mom and I know what he's done
03:18
to court her. I'm like,
03:20
I look at these guys and I'm like,
03:22
where's that energy? Bring it back?
03:25
Bring it on. Like what are your thoughts on expecting the
03:28
man to pay for it all or for them to just go
03:32
5050 or that whole 5050 thing?
03:35
What are your thoughts on that?
03:36
I think it definitely depends on the person and what they prefer
03:41
I do think when you take someone or invite someone on
03:45
it is the assumption is there that you will take care of
03:49
it and not necessarily an expectation.
03:51
But I don't think that someone has to pay for everything
03:55
in a relationship just to be romantic.
03:58
you know, the economy is tough,
04:00
like how can guys show effort without using money?
04:05
I don't think effort requires money all the time.
04:10
People either have time,
04:12
they have money or they have both.
04:13
So if you don't have money,
04:15
then you can spend time,
04:17
you can spend time planning a date.
04:19
You can ask the person what they like,
04:22
what their interests are.
04:23
One of like the most memorable dates that I've ever been on
04:25
was a date to the library.
04:27
because the person I was dating at the time knew that
04:30
I loved books and they're like,
04:31
I'm going to plan a day.
04:32
Let's go to the library.
04:33
You can pick out books like for me that you liked or
04:35
you've read before we can discuss them and read them together and
04:39
then we'll go get pizza after.
04:40
And that was like the perfect day for me in my because
04:43
while you listen to me,
04:44
when I said that I love books,
04:45
you actually want my book recommendation.
04:47
Like that shows so much thought,
04:49
like you thought of me rather than I've also been on dates
04:52
where someone dropped 2 $300 on me at a steakhouse restaurant.
04:56
Like, yeah, that's nice.
04:57
But I mean, anyone can spend money.
04:59
Can you think about me?
05:01
Do you know what I like?
05:02
And can you make time for that?
05:04
What would be your advice for young Latino men about to start
05:09
I always tell the young boys in my family when I'm giving
05:13
like, oh how to talk to girls one on one.
05:14
Like think about how you would want someone to treat your mom
05:17
or your sister. Like how would you want someone to approach
05:20
them if they were interested in them?
05:22
You want, you want someone to just roll up and be
05:25
hey mama sita like can I sign in your D MS?
05:27
Do you want to go to my place later?
05:28
No, you would want them to be like,
05:30
oh, like what's your name?
05:32
What are you interested in?
05:33
Like get to know someone treat me as a person or just
05:36
treat me as somebody that you think is hot,
05:38
right? Like anyone can consider anybody attractive but not everybody is
05:42
genuinely interested in who people are as people.
05:46
I feel like people think of people as profiles now like,
05:49
no, this is a real person behind the profile.
05:53
You're sending fire emojis and hot and hi,
05:58
when can we meet up?
06:01
Hi, how, what happened to?
06:02
Hello? What happened to,
06:03
how are you? Thank you so much.
06:05
We really appreciate you being on the show Antoinette.
06:07
Thank you. And I know you're on vacation.
06:09
So we appreciate you taking some time on your vacation,
06:12
making the time and enjoy your vacation.
06:15
Where can we follow you?
06:15
Where can we follow you to keep up with your content?
06:20
My content is on Tik Tok at a money moves.
06:23
be sure to tune in because it's needed.
06:27
Definitely. Well, thank you so much for the opportunity.
06:30
I hope you have an amazing day.
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