00:00
How many welcome comedian has said.
00:04
First of all, I man,
00:06
How's that familia? We gotta wash those hands,
00:10
family's great dude. Oh,
00:11
great. The baby is waking me up.
00:13
Like always we had our first what do you call that
00:16
emergency room scare?
00:18
Because he fell under my watch.
00:20
He's fallen like 1000 times.
00:22
All right. And he fell on his nail just came off
00:25
like boom. And I was like,
00:26
damn dude, leave right away.
00:28
She's like, you see this is what happens when you're on
00:30
your phone but I just,
00:32
that wasn't on my phone,
00:34
It's a baby. It's gonna fall.
00:36
Here's the thing about having a ring camera.
00:38
It captures everything and I was on my phone.
00:42
I was, there was a twerking video.
00:43
I was, I was hypnotized by and the baby fell and
00:48
Speaking of the of the little man man.
00:50
the drama with raising kids now and,
00:52
and, and being Latino or like so like,
00:55
are you raising a no?
00:56
So kid like, oh my God,
00:58
he's gonna be an OSA kid because I'm an OSA parent.
01:00
You know what I'm saying?
01:03
I get the, like the bare minimum.
01:05
Like my parents taught me the Spanish.
01:07
That's like the vulgar Spanish apparently.
01:09
Like I got, I got ghetto Spanish.
01:11
You know what I'm saying?
01:15
I just know those words,
01:16
you know, street Spanish.
01:18
I don't know the proper span.
01:20
I feel like I learned the same way like drive through Spanish
01:22
you know, like with the drive through operators yelling at
01:25
you in Spanish, like saying that that's what I learned,
01:27
that kind of Spanish loss like,
01:31
wow, I don't know all that.
01:32
The other thing that's going on with kids now and,
01:34
and you know, I have nephews,
01:36
it's like the ipad situation.
01:39
they start crying here.
01:41
Shut up. You look like an ipad.
01:45
Me and my girl were talking,
01:45
we're just like, I don't want him to grow up as
01:47
like these ipad kids,
01:49
you know, like for sure this generation is like,
01:52
we're messing these kids up like they're just gonna be,
01:54
yeah, they're zoned in by the matrix and just like,
01:58
you know, and then he had his first tantrum and let
02:02
I gave him that ipad so quick.
02:05
I need him to just like zone out.
02:06
I need him to get his hit of heroin and just nod
02:09
out, dude. So I've been peeping online like Rancho and
02:13
this whole western look is in,
02:15
man. We're in this new,
02:17
new stage. We're in this like country stage where people are
02:21
just dressing up cowboy.
02:24
They like the d they like the gentleman.
02:27
That's what they want,
02:27
baby. They want a gentleman.
02:31
hey, hey, look at that dad.
02:32
Hey, come here real quick.
02:33
Hey, come here to now.
02:35
Excuse me, I didn't mean to interrupt you guys' conversation,
02:38
but your beauty captivated me.
02:41
And when you're done talking here,
02:43
how about I buy you a drink and we get to know
02:45
each other. They like that baby.
02:47
They want some smooth shit.
02:49
That shit. Got me hot little Stevie in here.
02:53
Oh, your hair went straight,
02:55
dude. All that curls,
02:56
ladies, you gotta be careful because some of these cowboys,
03:00
they ain't real cowboys.
03:01
Some of these guys dressed apart but they ain't the part.
03:05
Let me tell you something right now.
03:07
If you have a flat tire and he's gotta read the manual
03:12
to read how to use a jack.
03:15
Let me tell you something.
03:16
He ain't cowboy. He ain't cowboy.
03:20
If he puts a one sauce on his steak,
03:22
that boy ain't cowboy.
03:24
He ain't cowboy fraud.
03:26
All right. If he has hand sanitizer anywhere in his house
03:30
and his car, he ain't no cowboy.
03:33
All right, he ain't country.
03:35
He's a poser. He's a city boy,
03:38
you know how to dance,
03:39
dance cowboy. I'm trying to learn,
03:41
bro. Like, it's so hard with the little boti guys
03:43
I feel like I'll be sliding over there.
03:44
I'm kind of, you know,
03:45
he's 100 pounds, bro.
03:46
Like those boots aren't,
03:47
aren't built for me,
03:48
honestly. Right. You like that,
03:50
that, that cool guy cowboy that goes in the bar slick
03:53
I don't want no trouble.
03:55
I just want to sip of my whiskey and that's it.
03:57
That's the vibe and girls just like,
04:00
oh my God, I wanna dance.
04:01
It's like I was in love once and right now I got
04:04
to get down to dance like,
04:06
oh my God, I got like fake dirt stains on me
04:08
you know, for the look,
04:09
I wanna cut his hair.
04:11
Oh my God. So I'll be running through your page.
04:14
Oh no. You know when I'm sad,
04:18
I just start scrolling through the reels and I'm like,
04:21
You know, like I wanna,
04:22
I'm, I'm feeling sad.
04:23
So there was a video that like stuck with me,
04:25
bro. And it was the when you know your boy isn't
04:28
over his act when she comes in,
04:29
can you ask her if she still loves me?
04:31
Because I don't care.
04:32
I don't care. I don't care.
04:33
I want it. I don't talk to me about that because
04:36
we all have that one boy that is just like the heartbroken
04:40
homie Dude. Rope I saw is,
04:43
oh, you can tell who's heartbroken,
04:45
right? Will they be acting like da da delete her number
04:49
We're no more. I'm so glad it's over.
04:51
Like I just realized how toxic she was.
04:52
You know, I was like,
04:54
you're still searching through her page.
04:56
You got, you got a fake profile right now keeping tabs
05:01
exactly. Dude. I mean li I'm not gonna lie to
05:05
I was, I was that he was hurting.
05:08
Wow, dude. But those days are over,
05:11
bro. It looks like it's still in there.
05:12
I can see you still go to like her favorite restaurant or
05:17
a dish and just cry in the corner,
05:19
bro. I moved to the other side of the country dog
05:23
What vibe is my little giving right now.
05:26
Your looks like she just had two kids and she has a
05:29
house and a two story house because she,
05:32
the white fence. I don't know Russ.
05:34
You're looking rough, you're looking rough but you know what?
05:37
You're gonna bounce back dog,
05:39
you're gonna bounce back.
05:39
I'm gonna help you out.
05:41
I bet. So then put me on how you get over
05:43
somebody. It's tough dude.
05:45
The best way is to just cut everything off,
05:49
cry for two weeks because the thing is we,
05:51
we like to hold in the cry.
05:53
We like to hold that in and then what happens?
05:55
You think you're good.
05:57
you start seeing a couple that's in love and that's when it
06:00
just starts, it starts coming at your boys and you just
06:03
you just see that like damn like that used to be
06:08
Dog in a happy place now,
06:09
dog. Look, we were surrounded with girls dog.
06:12
Yeah, but it's not the one I want.
06:14
I don't do that right now.
06:15
Dog really double doubles right now on me.
06:18
No, it's because like the report this,
06:21
I would have changed my life for her.
06:22
You know, that's the thing.
06:23
You don't wanna cry and if you wanna let the cry out
06:26
already, dude, let it out.
06:27
So when you see that you're like,
06:29
but I'm good right now,
06:30
dude, I'm over here eating animal style frog.
06:33
That's what I'm saying.
06:34
Eating three by threes.
06:35
I don't even care right now,
06:36
dog, but you gotta let it out.
06:39
Well, thank you for the wisdom,
06:41
bro. Appreciate. Come on,
06:44
Where can we follow?
06:45
I'm, I'm gonna have to check in with you.
06:47
You have to have a couple of wings,
06:49
bro. Don't disappear,
06:50
dude. So where can we follow you?
06:51
Make sure you follow me on Instagram.
06:53
He sus the comedian.
06:54
You already know, dude.
06:55
Check me out. Look at my skits like my stuff.
06:57
Share it. Nice ta take care guys.
07:01
Come on, give me a theatre.
07:02
Let's go to. That's what I'm talking about,
Series