00:01
Why are we even going to yoga class?
00:05
You're gonna fall on your ass.
00:07
We're very tight toned yoga ass.
00:09
What did your yoga ass have to drink last night?
00:12
Um Mostly clear uh non carbonated beverages.
00:16
I think one brown one I think.
00:22
Drop out your mother a lot.
00:24
I uh left her a bunch of voice mails about how she should be donating
00:27
to Planned Parenthood.
00:29
Are you gonna answer?
00:30
Mm mm No, no because she's gonna think that I'm an alcoholic
00:34
and then she's gonna launch into the I'm sorry that translates
00:40
to you're an alcoholic.
00:42
It translates to um I don't think that it translates to anything
00:49
So let's say you are a complex individual with lots of different
00:54
Even when you were in high school you floated between clicks
00:58
the student government over achievers the queer questioning
01:04
kids and the cheer squad.
01:05
I don't see you even befriended that one kid in your bio class
01:10
who loved Phil Collins.
01:13
II I still love perhaps it's your capacity for empathy.
01:19
Perhaps it's your chameleon like ability to just adapt to
01:24
Perhaps it's your aversion to arbitrary social hierarchies
01:28
Anyway, you've always had different kinds of friends.
01:35
But then one night while sipping scotch at an East Village
01:39
pont with an old friend from that primarily white, liberal
01:43
arts, New England College you went to who is currently going
01:48
through a nasty divorce with his wife for three months.
01:51
You get a text from your gay best friend who has an extra ticket
01:54
to see Mama at Madison Square Garden.
01:57
That very same night you feel guilty at the possibility of
02:00
canceling on your old college friend particularly during
02:05
You also know that explaining the importance of Malema to
02:09
him is going to be useless.
02:14
You try to prioritize quickly then to make matters worse.
02:19
You hear the loud cackling laughter of your cousin Tito.
02:24
My cousin is over there.
02:27
She's so you know that if your cousin Tito notices you snubbed
02:31
him, he's going to think that you're in and they already think
02:35
you're kind of fool of yourself ever since you went to that
02:39
Every time we go eat at a family function and she asks, is this
02:45
My grandmother doesn't know what that means.
02:47
A quick time space analysis determines you can only be one
02:51
of you this one time.
02:53
But who are you really?
02:56
Are you the chill streetwise kid from the hood?
03:01
Are you the mild mannered academic who can commiserate over
03:05
Stories of heartbreak So it's so fucking, are you the hip Woke
03:10
Latinx cultural consumer that major corporations are currently
03:16
You grow concerned because you can't decide sort of, you got
03:30
So it's like you're an onion uh-huh with all of these different
03:34
But then sometimes even after you've peeled them, you have
03:37
to put them back on.
03:40
I've never actually thought about it like that.
03:41
That's exactly right.
03:43
And you have to make a salad.
Series