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Growers vs. Showers and Dating Horror Stories

3G's
Sasha, Erik, & Jesus reveal the worst place they've had a one-night stand and pranks gone wrong.
Show transcript
00:00
And they're like, you gotta close your eyes though.
00:02
Fool.
00:02
You gotta close your eyes.
00:03
I'm like, all right, I'll close my eyes and I just did it and
00:05
this, I just poke a ho this jump like I chest out.
00:09
I'm telling you, I went like this when I hit the floor, let me
00:15
tell you something.
00:16
You know how fast you hit the floor from a king size bed to the
00:19
ground.
00:19
You just, it just suddenly just feels like all right, we're
00:29
back.
00:30
We got going OK, everyone.
00:32
Welcome to three Gs in the pod.
00:34
It could have been three PS.
00:35
It could have been me, me in the pit.
00:37
But we here sashays.
00:41
I know but you know I'm just trying to rhyme.
00:43
You feel me?
00:44
OK?
00:44
All right.
00:46
Yeah.
00:46
Is this a bull in the building Eric Rivera here?
00:49
Yeah.
00:50
And uh make sure if you like what you see you follow, you subscribe
00:55
you share with your friends, you talk to your parents about
00:58
it.
00:58
They might not understand but you know, we, we, we, we cool
01:01
we popping pods, the po po I start off with that outfit.
01:06
What's going on with that?
01:07
Outfit.
01:08
God damn Tiger King.
01:10
This is the tiger queen right here.
01:12
You know, I'm just trying new things.
01:13
You know, I'm a single, I'm on the hold up, hold up.
01:24
I feel like we should, we should have a siren or something going
01:26
on.
01:27
You.
01:28
Have you, have you gone?
01:31
Have you waiting?
01:32
I'm at the bit.
01:34
Hold on.
01:35
Have you so newly single.
01:36
Are you, are you on the apps or you?
01:38
What, what, what's the story?
01:40
Let me tell you, I don't need apps like relax.
01:48
No, no, no, I'm going to be honest with you.
01:50
I tried um I tried the app once the Hi the hinge hinge one and
01:58
like, you know, like I was um I was matched with like good looking
02:02
dudes but then there was this guy, he looked really good.
02:05
He was so good looking, but also like I did, I did pick him because
02:10
he did look like my ex.
02:12
That was like, so it's like going back when I met with this dude
02:15
he sounded like sponge bob, bro.
02:17
He's like, oh, how I, I was like, oh my God, that's the worst
02:22
bedroom voice.
02:23
Oh girl.
02:24
Does that feel good?
02:25
You don't want that guy handed from the back at all?
02:28
No, honestly, no, I couldn't.
02:30
No, no, I wouldn't even be a starfish.
02:33
I'll be a star star who your dad that I would have to be Patrick
02:39
and I'm not, wait, wait, hinge is like more like relationship
02:41
or is it just like a AAA?
02:44
I don't know, man, but I don't do, I don't do dating apps.
02:46
Like I just do this.
02:48
You got to take it through it because I have been married now
02:50
12, almost 13 years hinge.
02:53
I'm, there's like a bio, like, do you have to put like a, hey
02:56
opening line?
02:57
Like, what's your opening line?
02:58
Apparently?
02:59
Like with hinge?
03:00
You could do like this whole entire thing where, um, you could
03:04
use your voice, like, voice notes and stuff like that and like
03:06
you could play your favorite song.
03:07
You could put, like, quotes and stuff like that.
03:09
You like, like my, let me, let me tell you something.
03:13
If I had, I would be the type that would, like, play music in
03:17
the bag and what was going on?
03:20
Like, I like, like a, like, it's like an old school, I'm out
03:29
here, you know, I'm out here.
03:29
I do my thing.
03:30
I like soccer.
03:31
You know what I mean?
03:31
I like to laugh.
03:32
I like, it's like an old school, like an old school voice mail
03:34
Do you remember when you first had your phone?
03:36
And you were like, have, like, I got to find a song and all right
03:38
Here we go.
03:38
Ready go.
03:39
Hey, what up?
03:40
Yeah.
03:41
Yeah, I'm not here right now.
03:42
I'll call you back later.
03:44
I used to hate that shit.
03:45
Yeah.
03:45
I mean, I used to do that to people like, um I had my, my voicemail
03:50
I used to be like, hey, what happened?
03:54
That's not me like a oh fuck it.
03:57
I hated those girls.
03:58
They used to be like, huh?
03:59
What?
04:00
Just kidding?
04:01
Leaving them in the, that shit.
04:05
Yeah.
04:07
Fuck, it would mess with me.
04:08
And I'm like, you, I like he was like in his bed like let me call
04:11
this.
04:12
He was like this got the p he's like, hello?
04:14
Hey, hey, what's up?
04:17
I always have a hand like this like, hey, what's up?
04:19
Like a voice?
04:21
You fuck, I wasted my time.
04:24
I kicked everybody out of the room because you have one bedroom
04:26
and shit.
04:27
So, so take us through.
04:28
So you, you could pick a song, you pull a voice note.
04:31
Do you like all allegedly I haven't been on it so I don't know
04:35
You want it one time, one time but it, it has evolved apparently
04:39
And like, I don't know, you could do like a little trailer of
04:42
your life, I guess.
04:43
I don't know, but no one's going to be honest about their trailer
04:45
Like no one's going to be like, yo, you know, insecure, you
04:49
know uh I, you know, I got a child trauma.
04:53
Yeah, like no one is going to be, everyone's going to be like
04:56
hiking on a mountain somewhere like this with the hands of
04:58
like, yo, I'm a free man living in a free world.
05:00
It's just like, yeah, he got com.
05:02
They start like they all cool.
05:04
I'm cool.
05:04
I'm like, I'm cool.
05:05
I feel like everyone is always like, I like long walks on the
05:08
beach who likes long walks on the beach.
05:09
A long walk should be hurting my foot especially, I'm not broken
05:13
I broke my foot.
05:14
I don't want to freaking walk in the sand beach is glass.
05:17
Like fuck on the floor.
05:19
No, I would like to have a house on the beach so I could walk back
05:22
and forth.
05:22
But like that's what, what's your honest dating profile?
05:27
Like what like what are you telling people?
05:28
Like these are my issues.
05:30
But I use it if I use, I remember when I used Tinder but I used
05:34
it to gain followers on Instagram.
05:37
I would just be like, yo, I'm like, and I put that, yeah, I like
05:42
I would be like, I'm into guys and girls, right?
05:44
Just so that it was open to both and then they'll be like, yo
05:46
so you're not gay?
05:50
But what was your biggest lie you told on fucking dating sites
05:54
Like all the time with those dating sites?
05:55
I don't remember my lies but maybe like I ain't gonna lie.
05:59
I told the girl that I, my family was like that I was rich and
06:03
my family is like the owner of and I wanted the went in.
06:08
Yes, it would work because it's like, yo, that's a cynical
06:12
It's like I'm on Tinder.
06:13
I'm just trying to smash.
06:14
I'm not trying to, you know what I mean?
06:16
So I want to get to, I know you like rich guys.
06:18
Like yo, I got money.
06:19
You see, you see, you see the dude on the bottle?
06:22
That's my dad's my dad.
06:23
You see the, on the, that's my dad.
06:25
I'm rich on the first day.
06:27
I am rich.
06:28
Whatever you want.
06:29
Yes, but we have a second date.
06:31
I've toned it down.
06:32
It's like I think it was gonna get a second date.
06:35
So uh first date, whatever toppings you want on your pizza
06:38
girl, whatever.
06:39
Go ahead order from whatever.
06:40
That's what I'm trying to say.
06:41
Like you were on the first day and you're talking about, yo
06:45
my family got money.
06:46
You better take it to.
06:47
No, the first day.
06:49
That's what I'm saying.
06:52
No, we can't go.
06:54
No, no.
06:54
Hell no boo boo boo boo.
06:58
I was doing it in Arizona.
07:00
So there was no, no boo in Arizona.
07:01
It was like Applebee's and you were balling motherfucker
07:05
Like, you know, I used to do like, hey, you pick any appetizer
07:08
You want girl shit.
07:09
You know what I mean?
07:10
I was that guy.
07:10
Did you, did you do this?
07:11
She was like, oh my God.
07:12
Did you like what you want?
07:14
I don't know.
07:14
You know what uh let's get the sampler plan right here.
07:18
No, she'll be like I want the spinach dip.
07:21
But then I was the one that went like, oh my God.
07:24
Like that's right.
07:29
That's my great grandfather.
07:30
We got, yeah, I mean, like, if I go on a date and I split the bill
07:34
you already know this, that it, there's no smashing for real
07:38
Absolutely.
07:39
Like, and if I, if I look, let me tell you, if I split the bill
07:43
that means that there's no smashing and we could be friends
07:45
But if I pay for your meal, I never want to see you again.
07:49
Damn.
07:49
That's a block like that.
07:52
Yeah, if I do that like you know what I'm saying?
07:54
My free meal but no smash.
07:56
If you get a free meal, you get no smash.
07:59
You eat Eric.
07:59
What's your like done deal?
08:01
Like that's it like you're out of the day, I'm out, I'm gone
08:04
I, you know I've been there anyway, right?
08:17
So like what would have been a done deal for you?
08:21
I know that your wife is like you never been on a date.
08:24
You were like, man, fuck this.
08:25
I'm out like for example, example for me, my done deal was this
08:30
girl had bad breath.
08:31
I'm talking about like as I'm talking about like she had two
08:35
dead teeth in the back of her throat.
08:36
She was, it was I was like looking at her like bitch did you drink
08:41
pickle juice by the time?
08:42
Like you know what I mean?
08:42
Like she just, it stinks so much and I was like, and she was back
08:46
So I was just like, trying to get over that and I'm like, no,
08:48
well, you know what, I'm just, I just turned right when she
08:50
when she talks like this, what?
08:53
Like, it's loud and it's not even loud and I'm like, giving
08:55
her my ear like, yeah, what happened?
08:59
She was, it was bad, you know.
09:03
You know, come on, you know what I mean?
09:05
Come on.
09:06
You know what I mean?
09:07
I, I was breathing through my mouth on the end of that day.
09:11
Mas, he's like, no, this snorkel style I think I was like, we
09:16
gonna fuck with that shit.
09:17
I can't be with you but we, we go fuck.
09:19
Yeah.
09:19
But then it's like this is the thing that you're, you're talking
09:21
about her breathing.
09:22
So it's like even if she, you know what I'm saying, that shit
09:25
is gonna go right back.
09:26
You know what I mean?
09:26
I just jump in the shower right away.
09:28
Wait, what do you think?
09:28
She's blowing it back into his penis?
09:31
It just like my obviously like if she, if she got germs in her
09:38
mouth, well, that explains some type of rashes that I got.
09:41
That's a joke.
09:42
That's a joke.
09:42
That's a joke.
09:43
But uh yeah, he got like, listen, you negative on everything
09:49
except Ginger VIIS.
09:50
You got your, I got, I don't know.
09:59
Yeah, that's the thing but I'm with you.
10:02
I'm with you on the breath because III I date this one girl,
10:06
she was cute and she was a smoker.
10:08
So that's the thing.
10:10
And she was like, no, I got the, and I was like, no girl, I can
10:13
still taste like ashtray.
10:15
I'm good.
10:16
We good.
10:17
But that's the thing is like, there's some people that know
10:19
that they have these vices, like, you know, smoking and all
10:22
that stuff and they have it under control.
10:24
If you're someone who doesn't have it under control, you just
10:26
have a hygiene issue or you can't smell or you know, there's
10:30
something wrong with your.
10:31
No.
10:31
Yeah, there's something wrong with people that got hygiene
10:34
issues that they act like they don't got it.
10:36
And it's like, because I've seen dudes with like yo with nice
10:40
white teeth and they be like, hey, and it's just like, oh my
10:47
God.
10:47
Yeah, you like that?
10:49
You didn't?
10:50
I will not.
10:51
I will not.
10:53
Thank you.
10:56
No, I it's like if, if I'm going to invite you into my temple
11:01
right?
11:09
We have a higher standard like, dude, like I gotta do.
11:14
Yeah.
11:14
Yeah, I, I, dude, dude, we're very low standard and we will
11:18
do whatever it takes to like even if we don't like this dude
11:21
Iiii I went out with this girl one time.
11:24
Everything's going cool.
11:25
We go back to her place and before I go in, she goes, oh just so
11:28
you know, I've got cats, dude, I'm definitely allergic of
11:31
cats.
11:31
I was like, OK, just give me a sec.
11:33
I ran down to the store, got some Benadryl, like we go, I may
11:38
die tired like I might die.
11:46
But no, I would write checks.
11:48
I couldn't cash.
11:49
I would be like, yeah, yeah, we're about to get a joke.
11:51
I'm knocked out that crazy.
11:54
Yeah, like I'll take it.
11:55
Uh, it's gonna happen regardless.
11:57
You know what I mean?
11:58
All these excuses can happen.
11:59
I remember this one girl, we had a flat tire and I'm like, oh
12:03
damn.
12:03
And then the date went to shit.
12:05
So I just fixed the tire.
12:06
Ok?
12:06
Let's just go back to the house and I'm thinking what we're
12:08
still gonna do at the house when we get there, her roommates
12:10
are there and I was like, oh this is not gonna happen.
12:12
I'm like, hold on, I'm thinking, hold on, hold on, hold on,
12:14
hold on.
12:14
We gonna make this happen.
12:15
We're gonna make this happen through that door, right?
12:19
She had like a one of those washes and had a bunch of chairs like
12:22
let's go for a walk, let's go for a walk.
12:24
We went over there, we were trying to make out we're going in
12:26
I was touching things and then we hear a homeless guy like
12:28
talking like, so let's go and like fuck, hold up, hold up, don't
12:32
leave, don't leave.
12:32
We're gonna figure this out.
12:34
I would find a way it didn't happen.
12:36
But you know, but I mean, I, I respect the tenacity.
12:41
I don't think that, that, that's why it's so weird.
12:43
Like, I don't know, like, I don't, I've never met a woman that's
12:46
just like, no, we got to get it how we can.
12:48
Like, it's just like if it happens, it happens.
12:50
If it doesn't, then it, because women and I, I hate to say it
12:53
but like, you have more options, like you can get it when you
12:56
can, you can, you can go out and sweat and yoga pants, right
13:05
We have to work for, we have to be tiger, whatever you got on
13:11
You gonna fuck you up with that tiger king shirt girl.
13:17
Like what's the worst place you've gone to after a date or one
13:20
nights in a worst place I've gone to at their place.
13:24
Oh my God.
13:25
Like what do you mean?
13:26
Like where like like have you ever gone to their house?
13:28
And you're like, I can't do it now.
13:30
Ok?
13:31
I got one, I got one girl, girl, I got one girl, I got one, I took
13:36
this one girl, we were talking all everything was nice.
13:38
She was talking nice.
13:39
Everything was great.
13:40
I took one.
13:40
She lived in a holder's house, a holder's house.
13:44
A ho ho ho I tell you I'm talking about newspaper boxes of water
13:52
like I'm, I'm stepping on things, things smell.
13:55
It's like yo, something is dead in this area.
13:58
Like there's a dead cat somewhere.
13:59
Like I'm talking about she had like 12 cats.
14:01
It was crazy.
14:03
Uh, there was a pile of clothes that we were smashing on you
14:08
So you did do it.
14:09
You did do it.
14:10
They were playing, quit playing, you know what I mean?
14:12
It was, it was, you know what I mean?
14:13
It was, I was in, we went to, we went to this girl's house and
14:18
same thing, her mom because she lived with her parents and
14:20
her mom was the hoarder.
14:22
Like, because I remember I dated her for a little bit and I remember
14:25
I tried to help clean up and the mom like lost, you threw out
14:27
my old like, yeah, it was green girl.
14:30
You got it like you got.
14:31
So anyway, we go to her room and like she had a little dog, a little
14:34
Yorkie, there's, there's the yorkie poop everywhere everywhere
14:37
I'm like, y'all don't, y'all don't walk this dog outside like
14:40
this is what we do.
14:41
She had a little twin size bed, the bed like I, because I i it
14:45
had like holes and stains and I was like, we go, it's gonna happen
14:49
right here.
14:50
But afterwards I was like, oh, I'm gonna take a quick shower
14:52
and she tells me she goes, yeah, there, there's a stick by the
14:55
tub.
14:55
If the, if the water comes up too much you have to.
14:57
And I was like, no, I'll just shower when I get home.
15:00
Yeah, that's an absolute no.
15:04
Like if I go to a guy's house and he's a hoarder.
15:08
I'm a goner, like, I'm out of there.
15:11
So it's got to be squeaky clean.
15:12
It has to be squeaky clean.
15:14
Yes, absolutely.
15:15
But what if you?
15:16
Fine though?
15:17
No, there's no fine.
15:18
What if you like Trace Song?
15:19
Fine.
15:20
No, I, you know what I mean?
15:22
What do you mean to tell me right now?
15:24
You would not, at least can we just go outside and do this?
15:28
Take you back to?
15:30
No, like immediately like I know like that's why like women
15:34
and men are so different because I'm pretty sure I would have
15:39
if any of my girls were in that situation, they would text me
15:42
like, can you call me and I'll call her and she'd be like, oh
15:44
I gotta go, she'd be like, bitch, this motherfucker is living
15:49
in garbage, let him let him into my temple.
15:54
Yes, absolutely.
15:55
There's a lot of stuff going on that I want to believe, but I
15:58
just do not believe you.
15:59
He's fine.
16:00
I know for a fact there's no, ok.
16:02
If he's fine, like I'm fine too.
16:04
There's no value in that.
16:06
Ok.
16:06
All right.
16:06
All right.
16:06
All right.
16:07
I just saying, you know your worth and ladies, you should know
16:11
your worth too because if you smash a dude who's a hoarder,
16:16
he's a collector.
16:17
He like, I don't want to get canceled.
16:24
You know what?
16:24
Some people are hoarders and I respect that clean your mother
16:32
Um, but no, like, I just think, like, for me it just, at least
16:36
there has to be a possibility that we're going to be hooking
16:39
up more than I think that's why for me, I'm not like a one shot
16:42
deal, but I never had a one night stand.
16:44
No, they always come back.
16:48
No, I now take it so newly single.
16:50
What are the things you're looking for?
16:52
Because, you know, maybe some of the viewers might be interested
16:55
Oh, for me, you know, this is I'm not trying to get philosophical
17:02
or anything, but that's why I learned like you can love somebody
17:05
But if you guys are not going the same direction, it's going
17:07
to be hard to keep the relationship going.
17:09
Trying to the answer on the other one.
17:13
She's on jazz, on the other one that once said fine.
17:17
What the heart wants Sasha?
17:19
What do you like be lusty in the moment?
17:21
You'd be like, yeah.
17:21
Come on, let's do it, you know, but it's just like when you have
17:25
when you're somebody that has goals and ambitions and you
17:27
want to go somewhere and get to a certain place in your life
17:30
you can't just be with somebody that's going to hold you back
17:32
in any way.
17:33
You know, that doesn't support you in any way also.
17:36
Does you gotta have game, you like game?
17:38
I like somebody that can make me LA No, but do you like somebody
17:40
that you absolutely got to be strong game, got to be strong
17:44
But also if you, if you going to play the game, you better know
17:47
how to score.
17:48
Because if you out of here, if you out of here just like, oh,
17:53
I'm playing the game and you can't even like, can we get that
17:55
on a t-shirt?
17:56
You out here playing the game, you the reality of the situation
18:01
you're just talking and you just spit in the game and you're
18:03
not even, you have nothing to back it up.
18:05
Like that was, I know what you're saying because that was me
18:07
in high school II I started the game.
18:10
I could man, I had a good game but when we were alone like, ok
18:13
so what's up?
18:15
What are you serious?
18:16
Like you know when we were alone, I just my heart was just like
18:19
hold on, hold on, hold on, chill, chill, chill because you
18:21
know the cops are around.
18:23
I was coming up with excuses.
18:24
I'm like, hold on.
18:25
It's raining outside.
18:26
We can't if the weather is not my knee but you wanna do.
18:30
Are you sure you wanna do in the car?
18:30
I want to disrespect you like that.
18:31
I'm I'm cool.
18:32
Let's do it.
18:33
You want to do it?
18:34
OK.
18:34
Oh shit.
18:35
Ok, because the thing is my, my mom is a mama car and if she smells
18:39
some type of perfume, she's gonna get mad my little brother
18:42
for you, you know we come in the trunk.
18:44
Oh you down with the trunk.
18:45
Shit.
18:45
Yo, I got a soccer ball in the trunk.
18:47
I don't think we gonna fit because, you know, I always came
18:49
up with excuses not to score.
18:51
I don't know what it was.
18:52
Ok.
18:52
So it was that like, um, a thing that you were afraid of, like
18:54
your performance or like what was it that I was afraid?
18:57
Because it's like once you show them your peace, they gonna
19:00
know your peace and they're gonna talk and I wasn't confident
19:03
with the peace and I was like, wait a minute, I don't know because
19:05
sometimes I got a good day.
19:06
Sometimes I got a bad day, you know, depending on the, depending
19:08
on the weather, fellas, you know what's up because sometimes
19:11
there's some days in the summer you're just like, damn, that's
19:13
me.
19:13
You know what I mean?
19:13
Like, but in the winter, like this guy hides like a motherfucker
19:17
fuck, bro.
19:18
Not a show for sure.
19:19
But it's so depending on the good day I'm having.
19:21
If I'm in a great day, that thing he's up, he's ready to go.
19:24
I'm like, you can see that.
19:26
I'm a girl.
19:27
You gotta be in the right mood, right?
19:31
Yeah, man, it just, you know, you gotta be careful.
19:33
I was, I was always afraid at the end because women do talk.
19:38
They, they act like they don't but they talk, that's so funny
19:42
to me when guys like they, they do this thing where it's like
19:45
the game of like where you like just be like, oh yo, you're so
19:48
cute and you like, try to talk to girls and it's just like if
19:51
you wanna talk to a girl, make sure there's a girl you wanna
19:53
talk to because there's another pretty girl that might be
19:55
her friend and she gonna tell her like, oh he was just trying
19:58
to talk to and then that whole entire experience is gonna like
20:02
yeah, for the next year.
20:04
So it's like, you know, y'all be doing this game.
20:07
And so like if one of them, if one of the girls hook up with you
20:11
and they know what you're working with, like they gonna talk
20:15
about it.
20:15
Yeah, I tried talking to this girl at the, at the mall and stuff
20:17
and then she was working with my ex-girlfriend and after that
20:20
I asked her and so, so with that date, I'm actually busy.
20:22
I was like, oh you talked to that bitch.
20:23
Ok.
20:24
I told you about that time in the winter, huh?
20:27
Ok.
20:28
That was, that was something when she wasn't making icon.
20:31
She kept looking down at you.
20:33
Uh-huh.
20:33
Yeah.
20:35
Like how do you feel about like dating someone that you work
20:37
with?
20:38
No, no who work.
20:40
But back in the day when we used to have like, you know, like
20:42
a job like when you were working at like, you know, I, I because
20:45
I used to work at C Penny.
20:46
I don't know if you have AJ C Penney face like Eric, you look
20:49
like you would wear like a, we had a bunch of jobs.
20:52
I never worked at JC Penney.
20:54
Uh, it would have been Macy's Jesus God, JC Penny.
20:59
I can get my tires, my socks and a shirt and get out of here.
21:02
I don't get my clothes at the same place as home wear.
21:05
I just showed where I used to shop at.
21:08
I thought, I thought that, that, that, that tells us how has
21:10
thought that was a fancy store.
21:11
We're going Penny Penny.
21:14
That was upskill for me growing up.
21:16
That was upskill for me.
21:17
My family.
21:18
So you're, now you're disrespecting my family to watch them
21:19
out.
21:21
But where did you work at?
21:22
My, my, the, the, the one job I had for like the longest time
21:25
was a CV S pharmacy.
21:27
I was a pharmacy technician.
21:28
My mom would send people to the job because I had a lab coat on
21:32
They all call me the doctor and they would ask me.
21:35
Yeah, I, my, I had my arm.
21:40
It hurts like that.
21:41
And I was like, yeah, I just count pills.
21:42
Like what everyone from my mom's church would come.
21:45
I mean, I have a headache.
21:47
How do I?
21:47
And I'm like, that's excited when they see something like
21:52
that.
21:52
A name.
21:54
That's crazy.
21:55
So now the story is like, oh, he went from being a doctor to a
21:58
comedian, like everybody had goggles because I used to work
22:02
at a, as a, a clean, clean, like the, for the restaurant and
22:05
I had a goggles but it looked like a scientist.
22:07
My mom, I'm like, no, I am no goddamn scientist.
22:11
When they get excited.
22:12
When they see little things like that.
22:13
They think you're high, dude.
22:15
The prescription would come in.
22:16
I would just count it out.
22:16
Hand it to the pharmacist.
22:17
She would check that and that was it.
22:19
But I, first of all, you need to back up.
22:27
Can you write the prescription?
22:30
I have a, I have a, I'm like, I don't know.
22:34
But could you have gotten like the hook ups and stuff like that
22:37
No.
22:38
What do you want?
22:38
Hook ups?
22:39
I count a pill, man.
22:41
What a waste.
22:41
What a waste of a connect, what a waste of a, and my dad would
22:45
love to get like, hooked up with any job that I had.
22:49
I remember I used to work at pay in the back as like a cook prep
22:52
And I saw my dad in the corner arguing with the hostess.
22:56
I was like, what's going on over there?
22:57
And I see my dad, my work here, he wanted free food because I
23:01
worked there because to them, he was like my work here.
23:04
So I, you know, I'm just like, I can hook you up just because
23:08
I work here.
23:11
I'm your father and millionaires.
23:15
I'm like, that's not how it works.
23:17
He was for himself to get free food.
23:19
Yeah.
23:19
Like, parents are funny because they always like everything
23:22
that you're doing.
23:22
It's like an extension of them and stuff.
23:24
Like to this day my dad calls me and he's like, hey, Mommy, you
23:28
sure you don't want to go to be a lawyer?
23:30
You don't want to be a lawyer.
23:31
I'm like, no, I'm like, I got a whole fucking career but for
23:34
them, like my dad is like, I'm, I'm doing nothing because I
23:37
can't buy him a house yet.
23:38
You know what I mean?
23:39
Like until I buy him a house, it's not, they do put a lot of pressure
23:46
man.
23:47
But hold on.
23:47
What about you?
23:48
We, we pay away CB where did you work?
23:50
I worked in a hotel for seven years and before that, yeah.
23:53
So I worked in a hotel for seven years before that.
23:56
I worked um What the fuck?
23:59
Oh I worked at Sketchers.
24:03
Yo, I was so bad, bro.
24:05
Then I worked at, oh my God, I worked at a law firm and when I was
24:09
18 years old, I worked at a law firm in Atlanta as a secretary
24:14
I didn't go to school for any of that stuff.
24:15
So I didn't know the lingo.
24:17
I'm from the hood, right?
24:18
So how did you connect?
24:21
Connect.
24:21
That's how we do it.
24:22
That's how we do it.
24:24
I graduated high school and then I start working at the front
24:26
desk and, like, I guess the way that I pick up the phone, I'll
24:29
be like, hello.
24:30
You know, like I didn't have, like, the training or like, hello
24:33
Yeah.
24:34
So then they took me off from the front desk and the, like, we
24:37
need to talk the way you're talking, they were like, more like
24:42
mail room material and that's where they sent me, they sent
24:49
me to the mail room.
24:50
Now I want to explain something to y'all and I don't want y'all
24:53
to judge me like if I'm dumb but they had me send out mail, they
24:58
have me send out 300 like mail whatever like envelopes, right
25:05
And I did it and then all of a sudden 300 envelopes.
25:10
No, they they started coming back because I put the address
25:14
as a receiver like the main address is the receiver and that
25:18
and like if the people were sending it to us, yeah, the public
25:22
education failed me.
25:23
So they were like, oh my God, what are we going to do with this
25:25
girl?
25:26
They called me the rock in there.
25:27
They were like, oh the rock because they were like because
25:30
they were like, you know, there, there's nothing in there
25:32
like it was and I'm like, but I heard I found this shit out like
25:36
two years ago because there's nothing in it but like I and I
25:44
was just like, yo and I just found that out like last year, like
25:47
you know, like I blowing up doing social media and stuff like
25:50
that and the lady was like, oh my God.
25:51
And to think we used to call you the rock that was like, didn't
25:57
know.
25:57
At first she just read her comments like, yo, the rock is hilarious
26:00
Like, ok.
26:01
Yeah, I am like the rock Dwayne Johnson.
26:03
Like, no, no, no, no.
26:04
But, but the thing too is that um after a while I still kept working
26:08
there because I kept making them laugh.
26:10
So they kept me for another six months until they were just
26:13
kind of like, we can't hire you to be a clown because I would
26:15
just be like, hey, like they, I was able to keep the, you were
26:18
you were just the office just like, I'm feeling sad.
26:21
Send the rock in the rock with the rock.
26:24
I having a bad day.
26:26
Then, you know, then I worked at sketchers and that was like
26:29
cool or whatever.
26:30
I was fucking up there too because like, I, I didn't wanna be
26:33
in it.
26:33
But what, what was your favorite job?
26:35
Um What I'm doing right now?
26:36
Honestly, I'm not even trying to be like the hotel was fun.
26:42
The hotel was fun because like, you know, when I would talk
26:44
to the, like the stories of the clients and the guests, it was
26:47
just like, so funny.
26:48
Like you just, I would get like so many different like crazy
26:51
people.
26:52
I can't even think of a story right now but or like, I'll switch
26:55
up my name like I could just be like, whatever I want.
26:57
I'm like, thank you for calling the Intercontinental.
26:59
Yeah, just thank you for calling the Intercontinental New
27:02
York Times Square.
27:02
The Yeah, like I was just like, but like the hotel was my favorite
27:09
I worked, I had a bunch of different jobs at CBS Pharmacy.
27:11
I worked at the gap and I hated customers because like, dude
27:15
like you had to fold everything perfect.
27:17
People would just come in like, I'm gonna take this one out
27:19
and everything would just fall over and they're like, you
27:20
gotta refold.
27:21
I'm like, I don't wanna refold.
27:22
That is especially like in Christmas, I used to work at Hollister
27:26
that, that was the worst, the worst.
27:28
And when I worked at Hollister, they were like, I want to work
27:30
in the front.
27:31
They call him the model right in the front.
27:33
That's what they were called the models.
27:34
I wanted to be a model.
27:36
You wait, ho no.
27:37
Abercrombie is where the dude, you just so, so no, no, the Hollister
27:42
was similar.
27:43
They're trying to copy the same thing, but they were calling
27:44
the models, right?
27:45
And I, I applied for the models and they're like, no, we don't
27:47
got nothing for the models.
27:48
It's all booked up, but we got some for the back like the stuff
27:52
and I'm like, yes, I'm in the back and all for everybody in the
27:56
back fails, way fails like ugly face.
27:59
Everybody's just like not good looking.
28:01
People are in the back clothes, same hook up as we get all the
28:05
discounts.
28:05
We get all the benefits but we're all the ugly people are in
28:08
the back.
28:09
And when, when we come out to put the flo the closure to scare
28:14
the people out here, dude, get the fuck back there.
28:16
So you said that was legit.
28:19
I know that was for sure.
28:20
I used to do warm up uh for uh for a talk show for the Montel Williams
28:24
show, which I never understood why they had a warm up comic
28:26
because his, his topic was so heavy.
28:28
So they'd be like, listen, the pressure go out there and make
28:31
them laugh but not too much because this next family is coming
28:33
out.
28:33
They lost everything in the fire and they, they, they're sick
28:36
and dying and so you'd be like, OK, anyway, so uh exactly that
28:41
like the audience coordinator would put all the pretty people
28:43
up front and the, and the ugly people in the back and some of
28:46
the people would come multiple shows and sometimes like,
28:50
you know, towards the end, I'd be like, hey guys, uh you know
28:53
make sure you turn the phones off this, that and the other
28:55
anybody got any questions about that and then the, the back
28:58
road would excuse me I've been here like 10 times.
29:00
I'm always in the back.
29:02
Like, I don't know, you have to control that lady with three
29:07
teeth if you could just, that's why with me up wigs, I knew in
29:13
those talk shows they put the ugly people for sure.
29:16
You know what's crazy?
29:17
I worked at TG I Fridays before I worked at, you know, the Rock
29:20
uh spot and the Rock but I, it was on 42nd street and it no longer
29:25
exists.
29:26
But they will keep everybody that was hood and they look hood
29:29
upstairs and anybody that was white or like, you know, look
29:32
like our money.
29:33
They kept them downstairs by the window so that people walk
29:36
by.
29:36
They're like, oh, ok.
29:37
But everybody that was like from the hood they sent, they sent
29:40
them upstairs.
29:41
They were like different and the way down.
29:47
Hi, welcome to TJ.
29:48
Would you like to hear our special?
29:50
They're like, this is what we got upstairs.
29:52
My, my favorite, my favorite like job was in Tucson or Zone
29:57
It's called Fantastics.
29:58
And it's like, uh, I don't know what you guys call golf and stuff
30:00
here.
30:00
You know what that is?
30:01
Or Booms farm or what do you guys call you guys?
30:04
It's like a, what do you call it?
30:05
Like a mini golf place?
30:07
Miniature golf.
30:07
They have go carts, they have bumper boats, they have all that
30:10
stuff, arcades.
30:11
And I remember it was just a lot of I remember, uh, we were like
30:13
in the Go Karts and some kid just got, like, really hurt, like
30:16
he just, like, flipped and stuff and we're supposed to tell
30:19
them not to bump, like to, like, we can't bump into each other
30:22
But we didn't, I didn't tell him I was, my, my job was to tell
30:26
him and tell them you can't hit and I just didn't, and I'm thinking
30:29
like, why would they?
30:31
But that's exactly what they were doing.
30:32
Their job was to like, hurt each other and just one of them.
30:35
So, yeah, he was a super two kid kid for sure.
30:41
Yeah.
30:42
Yeah.
30:42
Yeah.
30:42
That was the first time that I was just like there were attacking
30:44
me.
30:45
It wasn't a Skyler.
30:46
It wasn't a Tyler dude.
30:48
It was like some, that's not right.
30:53
You know, you try to use big words like sue me.
30:55
We're gonna have to get the lawyers involved homie and like
30:59
trying to say a number of what code it is.
31:02
7 45 of them, we're gonna put a, it's like, dude, why would you
31:07
They tried, I got fired because of it for sure.
31:09
You know, but they tried, they tried but I was making money
31:12
dude.
31:12
Remember, remember that first?
31:14
What's the first thing you bought with that big check in high
31:16
school?
31:17
That high school check?
31:18
You were just like, oh, this is a lot of money.
31:19
It's only like $200 but it felt like a million.
31:23
What would you buy?
31:23
What was the first big thing?
31:25
It was like, it was hot back in the day, man.
31:29
I think I would buy, I bought myself like clothes because,
31:32
yeah.
31:33
Right.
31:33
Because I think my parents would buy the clothes and my dad
31:36
would never want to give me like, what was in?
31:39
Like, I wanna get the air force ones.
31:41
I want better.
31:42
I want better.
31:43
They were not Air Force ones.
31:44
1st, 1st check pair of air max because I was like, I like you
31:47
I wanted the sneakers and my mom would take me to modes and like
31:50
man, these are on sale.
31:51
This is where you can have, dude.
31:52
I remember one time I bought a pair and she bought me a pair of
31:54
Nike.
31:54
These are Nikes too and I put them on, dude.
31:56
I went to school the next day, I'm rocking them and my head,
32:00
I'm like, yeah, I'm fresh.
32:03
This girl goes, I got the same pair on.
32:06
Oh no, no, I went home.
32:11
I was like, I don't want this no more.
32:12
My mother was like, no, they're still good.
32:13
You don't have the girl out loud.
32:17
I got the same and she did and I, I got made fun of all school years
32:21
So first job, first check I went and got me some, I was like,
32:24
OK, let me tell you something.
32:27
Here we go.
32:28
There's a store.
32:29
There was like this big warehouse store called El Mundo in
32:33
the Bronx.
32:34
Right?
32:35
And it was like, they'll have everything but for cheap, like
32:39
straight up cheap.
32:40
So knock off it will be like knockoffs of stuff.
32:43
But that's where you would go, like to buy stuff to somebody
32:46
with a Y Yeah, like this is stuff that you like, buy stuff just
32:49
to send it to Dr.
32:50
And people in Dr will be like, yo, I got the new shit, right?
32:53
So go to the and like I remember I was before you could get there
32:57
I'm telling my dad, I'm like, I didn't go.
33:03
He's OK, mama, I got you.
33:05
So we go to I'm like, oh, we're gonna buy stuff for my family
33:09
in the Dominican Republic, right?
33:10
So we go on, he takes me to like this the section and he pulls
33:13
one out.
33:14
He's like, oh, this one is and it's like a snowman like this
33:20
and it was like south face, right?
33:23
It was like a south face.
33:24
So he's like, I'm like, and I'm like, no, please, please I told
33:32
I have to go to school like please, I'm like crying.
33:35
I'm like, I'm not, yo, my dad was so heartbroken that he ended
33:41
up getting me a pepe coat that day because he felt so bad.
33:45
And then he was like your Christmas present, birthday present
33:49
and you know what I did because you know we grow up so poor.
33:52
I was with that kid.
33:53
That kept the tag on it.
33:55
And I'm like, oh shit like, oh yeah.
33:57
Oh shit.
33:58
Oh my God.
33:58
And people could see how much of this like somebody just that
34:02
shit off.
34:05
Parents never understood.
34:06
It was like a month in and I still had one friend that ross it
34:09
for you.
34:09
You tag, let me just turn down.
34:11
My dad's gonna be pissed because he told me not to rip this off
34:16
I under the value of what that brand or what, like how you got
34:19
made fun of a school.
34:20
Like I remember when, when everyone was like had TIMS like
34:23
I want a timberland so bad and I show my mom like, please, please
34:26
And then one Christmas dude, I get the box, I open it up and it's
34:28
it's the, it's the payless version it and I was like, she could
34:34
put him on, walk around.
34:37
My, my dad came home because he had a connect at some like ass
34:43
dude.
34:44
You know, like those like dudes that just be finding stuff
34:47
in the back of the trucks.
34:47
He found this, connect with this guy that sold knockoffs.
34:50
Jordan's and he knew I liked the Jordan.
34:52
Hey, hey, I got a guy shoes got on, I got your shoes on and I'm
34:56
like, you did don't win.
34:58
He showed me and they were and I couldn't like you got me, Jordan's
35:01
but they were knockoffs and here's the thing about knockoffs
35:08
they're not sewed in the right way.
35:11
They don't have that same texture.
35:12
They got the same.
35:13
So I'm using the shoes like, if they were Reagan.
35:16
So I'm playing basketball in them, bro.
35:18
When I did that first drill and I just, you know, you stopped
35:20
for the suicide that my, my toe came out, it went right through
35:24
and I'm like, oh, I was like, and now I got over here like, act
35:27
like I did not just like slip my whole foot out and I'm like,
35:29
oh shit.
35:30
And everybody's like, why would this come off?
35:33
And they were trying to figure out my shoe, my friends and I'm
35:35
just like, dude, just let it go.
35:36
Why does it feel so light?
35:37
Like paper?
35:38
Let it go.
35:39
Keep my shoe bag, dude.
35:41
Is Michael Jordan sitting.
35:44
Why Michael Jordan on the bench?
35:46
He just like with the towel on the little logo, man.
35:50
I was embarrassed.
35:51
Yeah.
35:51
It like when I used to get like or anything that was like name
35:56
brand, I'll make sure to keep it like clean.
36:00
But if anybody would have stepped on there, I would start crying
36:02
because I'm like, I can't afford another one.
36:04
I got to wear these all year.
36:08
Yo, is that real shit?
36:09
Because your parents would be like, yeah, I'm gonna get you
36:11
this and that's it.
36:12
And they used to give me tight and I look at my aunt and she'd
36:14
come through with furs and shit.
36:15
Colin Klein and all nice, nice.
36:20
My mom would like for Christmas she would take us to, to thrift
36:23
stores because, like, she's like, oh, you want name brands
36:25
We're gonna go to the thrift store.
36:26
But she would take us to, like, Connecticut.
36:28
Like, she's like, that's where the rich people are.
36:30
That's where they, that's in Greenwich, that's where the
36:33
rich people and you're gonna get nice stuff.
36:35
And I would, she would like, like Ralph Lauren and I'd be like
36:37
OK, cool.
36:38
And I go to school, right.
36:39
OK.
36:40
All right.
36:40
What's up y'all, dude?
36:41
I remember one Christmas.
36:42
I was like, they're like, what would you get for Christmas
36:44
Look at this Tommy Hill figure shirt and this dude was like
36:46
why is it so fa bro?
36:47
And I was like, that's the look, man.
36:50
It's what, that's what makes us comics though.
36:53
We had, we had to live that type of life for us to go on stage and
36:56
talk and not be embarrassed because our life was embarrassing
36:59
and we went through a lot of stuff where people were like, yo
37:02
that's embarrassing.
37:03
Like that's what made us the way I used to get called.
37:07
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
37:09
You tell you something.
37:10
You look like a, that's why I can see that.
37:15
I always loved that.
37:16
My name never rhymed with anything.
37:17
You can't rhyme Eric.
37:18
You really had to push.
37:20
No.
37:20
But they, they didn't call me that because I was looking cute
37:23
So like we were ok.
37:24
When I live with my dad, they told you that because you were
37:26
looking cute.
37:26
No, they didn't call me that because I was looking cute.
37:29
So I, you know, I was living with my dad and my step mom and she
37:34
had trouble like doing my hair because my hair is like really
37:36
curly and so like, she didn't know the product to use.
37:40
So my hair was always frizzy in the front.
37:42
Every time I went to school it was frizzy in the front.
37:44
And then I had like these bottle cap glasses and I was just like
37:48
really skinny.
37:49
And then yeah, I have pictures, I have pictures and then um
37:52
I have like, then I wear my brother's clothes because I would
37:56
get hand me downs from my brothers.
37:58
So I would go to school looking like a bum and they'd be like
38:00
well, you have to.
38:07
Yes, exactly.
38:08
Yeah.
38:08
So that's, you know what I'm trying to say is that, that's what
38:10
makes me a comedian, you know, and I remember one time I was
38:13
dating this guy.
38:13
He was just like, you, you know, you have like the personality
38:17
of like a, like a, like a weird ugly girl and I'm just like, because
38:22
I was bitch, you know what I mean?
38:28
That I'm like, they're like, how are you so dumb to earth?
38:30
I'm like, I had a tough life and it humbled the fuck out of me
38:32
I'm telling you, man.
38:34
I remember I had a mistake of like uh in class, I fucking released
38:39
gas in third grade and let me tell you something.
38:42
Nothing in third grade.
38:43
My guy in third grade, if you, let me, let me tell you something
38:49
right now, it's not the sound, it's the smell, bro.
38:52
Like that's what made it worse because the sound had everybody
38:55
laughing and it was embarrassing and everybody kind of calmed
38:58
the teacher, everybody relax, calm down.
39:00
Let's grow up.
39:01
Came in when everybody calmed down, then the whiff came in
39:04
and everybody, and it's that one loud ass kid.
39:06
Like what the fuck?
39:07
I'm like, dude, it's not that bad.
39:09
It's not, I'm gonna tell you now as comedians fucking feel
39:12
it happened in third grade as comedians, dude.
39:15
So we could go up on stage and kill, but nothing will ever be
39:19
funnier than being in school like in elementary school and
39:22
hearing a fart for that is the funniest because you know, you're
39:25
not supposed to laugh like, dude, I like, I, I don't think I've
39:29
laughed that hard ever in my life.
39:31
I just uh you're trying to hold it in and like that shaking in
39:33
your stomach like hearing that in class.
39:36
But I used to do the purpose farts and that was my thing was I
39:41
used to love it when it wasn't, when it wasn't on purpose that
39:47
it hurt because I was like, no, that was a real like accident
39:49
Like don't laugh dude.
39:52
And it's your best friend that throw you under the bus like
39:53
oh like stop dude.
39:56
Like it was an accident like damn.
40:00
And then the girl that you crush is just like now I was like,
40:03
really like you, I love you.
40:07
Yeah, she just looked at now I couldn't talk to her.
40:09
That was it, dude.
40:10
Even in high school I remember telling her I had a crush and
40:12
he was like, I liked it too.
40:13
But one time you fart, I'm like, oh yeah.
40:15
Well, you remember that?
40:17
Yeah, that's crazy.
40:18
I don't fart no more.
40:19
I don't do that outside of my own private room, you know?
40:23
But yeah, that's the, that's the worst in third grade.
40:25
Listen, I got traumatized with farts.
40:27
Like when I used to get like, yes, like my brothers used to like
40:30
play fight and then they'll fart in my face.
40:32
Oh, you down and do and I'm like, I'm not a boy.
40:35
I hate this.
40:37
And so when people were like, just like freaking fart, it will
40:40
just take me back to the, you know what was evil?
40:43
You know what was evil?
40:44
The cup far.
40:45
Remember that?
40:47
Oh no.
40:48
Do the cup?
40:49
Remember the cup?
40:50
And it would just be like, like let me tell you the release and
40:55
your eyes will get watery and you just like, oh I thought I died
40:58
and you just saw God, you were taking me back to that.
41:01
Like they would like exactly pin me down fart right in my face
41:07
Or do the, I would cry as a little kid.
41:10
Like my, my older cousin, like, hey, come on, I'll tell you
41:12
a secret.
41:12
Just fart right on my head.
41:14
And yeah, I was like, come on, I want nothing to do with this
41:24
I tell you.
41:25
That's the trauma.
41:26
That's the trauma.
41:27
I remember one of my oldest brothers, he was supposed to like
41:30
moving on from the parts but he was, but he was supposed to babysit
41:34
me and then he had a girl over and we had like um we had bunk beds
41:39
right?
41:39
And so uh he brought like, he wasn't supposed to bring somebody
41:43
over but he's like, yo, you want to play Tarzan?
41:46
I'm like, yeah, yeah, sure.
41:47
I want to play Tarzan.
41:49
So he just tied me up to the top of the punk bed.
41:51
I'm just tied you up so that I could because he knew like, if
41:57
she came over, I was like, what are you guys doing?
41:59
You know, she thought it was to be here.
42:01
So he just tied me up to the punk.
42:02
But I was like, this is like, yeah, like Tarzan, like just hanging
42:07
and then my hands were turning blue.
42:09
I got blue.
42:09
Oh Shit.
42:10
No, they did.
42:11
You know my cousin did, they did the, the fucking, the trusting
42:13
game and they're like, hey, jump, I'm gonna carry you and I
42:17
and my dumb ass like I knew they always, they always mess with
42:19
me.
42:20
So I'm like, hey, I, I ain't that dumb.
42:21
I'm letting my other brother do it.
42:23
So my brother did it and of course they would do it on, they would
42:25
do it and I'm like, oh no, you do it and then they do it, they're
42:27
all doing it right because they know that I was building some
42:30
trust, they trust that you must have issues.
42:33
Now, girl, come on, girl, come on.
42:35
So then I looked at him and I was like, all right.
42:36
Well, it's been three, all three of them did it.
42:38
None of them got hurt right?
42:40
Dog.
42:41
And they're like, you gotta close your eyes though, fool,
42:43
you gotta close your eyes.
42:43
I'm like, all right, I'll close my eyes and I just did it and
42:46
I just poke a ho this jump like I chest out.
42:50
I'm telling you I went like this when I hit the floor, let me
42:56
tell you something.
42:56
Do you know how fast you hit the floor?
42:59
From a king size bed to the ground?
43:00
You just, it just suddenly just feels like you, you like it
43:06
doesn't hurt.
43:06
I tried to talk and I just like the air just went, you ever hurt
43:10
yourself?
43:10
You just like that sound that came out was I couldn't even talk
43:16
I just made noises and then of course my drunk uncle was the
43:19
one taking care of us.
43:19
So he was already messed up and he looks at it, he's like, hey
43:22
it's OK.
43:24
I'm like, no, I'm for real.
43:30
It's OK.
43:33
They taking care of like being around.
43:38
Yeah.
43:38
The worst.
43:38
They're the worst.
43:39
I remember one time my brothers like they were supposed to
43:41
take care of me and they were supposed to give me chocolate
43:42
milk and they made me coffee.
43:44
Oh Yeah.
43:45
Yeah.
43:45
Yeah.
43:45
Yeah.
43:48
They made me fuck.
43:49
And I'm like, yo, what is the, is it look like chocolate?
43:55
Yeah, but I'm energized.
44:01
Oh dude, I'm telling you that.
44:02
Is that uh man, I got, I got a, I got a rough one but now I don't
44:07
know if I should share this one rough.
44:09
This one rough.
44:10
I don't know.
44:10
This one's rough.
44:13
Your family relationship, something.
44:15
Yo, let me tell you something.
44:17
How much Yeah, this is how bad of a kid, kids we were.
44:21
This is how bad we were.
44:22
This is how fucking bad I was.
44:23
We, our parents are drinking, they're all drinking and my
44:26
dad had a lot of friends over the neighbors would come.
44:28
Everybody was just drinking.
44:29
That was, this is the nineties.
44:29
Everybody was drinking front of the kids.
44:31
You know what I mean?
44:32
They would get the kid to go, hey, go make me a beer, go on.
44:34
So you open it, you know, give it to them.
44:36
So then we started thinking what if we, what if we, what if we
44:42
just take his beer because he was already Lucy.
44:45
My, my uncle was just not, my uncle, my uncle's friend was just
44:48
already, we hated him because he was just too vulgar loud.
44:53
Hit us and all the stuff.
44:54
It was so dumb.
44:55
So we snuck his beer out and it's been sitting in the sun.
44:58
So we're like, he's not gonna notice the, it's hot.
45:01
So we dumped it out.
45:01
We peed on it and let me tell you, not just me, everybody peed
45:05
on.
45:07
That was the game of the night.
45:09
And we all like we bring it back, we brought it back and we were
45:12
waiting and it took like 10 minutes for him to get thirsty because
45:15
he's telling a story and he act like he'll get in, he remind
45:20
himself in those stories and, and again, and we're just like
45:22
damn it because you're sitting there waiting like come on
45:24
come on drink like he's almost there, dude, he's almost there
45:27
We're all just in the bushes waiting for this to happen.
45:29
The moment he made contact with his lips and he just, he took
45:33
a one of those like big um thirsty sips out like and he just like
45:38
come on, he made this because let me tell you that they like
45:50
as the water in his eyes went, I got out and he, he went, he cleaned
45:59
it and looked at it and he was like, I went for another goal but
46:03
you know, he's like, hey, bring me another beer but he still
46:08
took two gus.
46:09
And we're like, yeah, this guy had two.
46:11
You guys ever tell him?
46:13
You know what?
46:13
It's one of those that we're like, we're gonna die with this
46:15
one.
46:16
But now it's how, that's why I was questioning it.
46:21
But you know what?
46:22
He's thug life, thug life, baby, thug life, right?
46:25
But let me tell you something.
46:26
He, until this day I think he was wondering like I had that one
46:29
beer.
46:31
You know, you know what dude don't think he ever since then
46:34
he wanted to stop drinking.
46:35
But he, he was like, no my life because they have a weird taste
46:39
But you know, he took a weird taste.
46:42
I know he's going out drinking and he's used that as a fact like
46:49
everybody like, oh did you know that this happened?
46:51
You know the when the is in the sun for like 30 minutes like peace
46:57
and they're like, I can only imagine.
47:02
I tell you no, he's no from my experience.
47:06
No, no, no, no, no.
47:06
It's like circle explaining that.
47:14
Don't put it in the sun because it in the fridge, you don't want
47:16
it in the sun, the chemicals it develops.
47:34
Oh my God.
47:35
I was a kid.
47:36
I was a bad teeth.
47:38
That teeth, that teeth activity, man.
47:41
We got, we have a silver teeth the week we have a too let's do
47:44
let's do.
47:45
We'll bring it to the next segment.
47:46
What is one segment that we like in the show?
47:48
One of my favorite segments because obviously, you know,
47:50
I was a silver tooth kid.
47:51
Yeah, for people.
47:52
No, no.
47:52
Obviously you saw a little bit of it like a silver two kid.
47:55
Is that one kid?
47:56
That's just like reckless, right?
47:58
He's already gone.
47:59
The thing is like they got those silver teeth in their mouths
48:02
because they don't care about their themselves.
48:05
That's the sign, that's the sign.
48:06
You know, you already know what kind of person he's gonna be
48:08
when he grows up.
48:09
He's the type of guy that cuts you in the freeways.
48:12
You know what I mean?
48:12
He's the type of guy who wants to fight everybody at a party
48:15
Silver tooth.
48:15
I I appreciate you telling me I got kids.
48:17
I don't have kids, but now from now on any time my kids, I can
48:19
never play them.
48:20
I'm like, yo, smile real quick.
48:21
Your friends, your friends is coming out of your mouth.
48:25
You not gonna be like a horror film about your tooth right now
48:28
You know, it'll be like a horror film.
48:30
Like if you see your son and you'd be like, hey, can you open
48:32
your mouth and then you see like one to be like, oh my God, he's
48:34
becoming one of Yeah, one or 22 tooth.
48:37
Let's pull that tooth out.
48:39
All right, we're going into our clip of the week of the silver
48:41
tooth kid of the week.
48:44
Look, first of all, you see that sign that why he got forced
48:54
Yo, Mike G saw Jesus, bro.
48:56
He literally lick the sugar.
49:00
That's sugar salt.
49:02
Don't make you do that.
49:04
You know there's a problem when your kid is looking at you and
49:06
he's looking at the next thing he's about to mess up at the same
49:08
time.
49:09
I don't know what kind of gang signs he threw, but he's letting
49:11
us know what kind of future he's gonna have.
49:13
You know what I mean?
49:14
Look at that also that also if you look, he, he went for the premium
49:18
sugar.
49:19
He did not go for the store brand sugar on the bottom.
49:21
He's, he's going in yo, this kid is crazy.
49:23
The, the the most wild thing about this is that the parent is
49:26
recording it going like to the point that it feels like the
49:31
parent is like, yeah, I wanna have kids just so they can be a
49:32
little tiktok stuff.
49:34
Yeah, for real man, dude.
49:36
What kind of name like?
49:37
He looks like a, he looks like a, looks like a yo, that guy is
49:44
Wow, bro.
49:45
It's a wild boy right there.
49:48
Oh He looks like a little Chucky dude.
49:49
A little Freddie with little shirt on.
49:53
What would you do if you saw your kid like that?
49:55
Oh my God.
49:55
I would just try to return him to return it, you can't take him
49:59
back to Target.
50:00
And I was, I don't know, I would just have to be like, yo, this
50:02
is, don't be like that mom.
50:04
That was like, no, he's like a kid.
50:05
You don't know him.
50:07
You don't know my son.
50:07
Like I know him, like I know him, he's gonna be a bully for you
50:11
No, I, I would definitely like be that mom and be like, yo, uh
50:14
talk to the teachers like he is your responsibility now.
50:17
Uh For like a couple of hours, please uh take care of him, take
50:22
care of.
50:22
Uh let's switch gear.
50:23
We're gonna jump into our segment called, that's where we
50:26
answer questions and voice mails from our fans who have questions
50:29
for us.
50:30
So if you do have questions, make sure you uh comment on, on
50:32
the video below.
50:33
Uh You can, we're gonna set up a Google form so you guys can send
50:36
in anonymous questions in case you want to put your name out
50:38
there or your, you know, your your business out there.
50:40
We'll keep it anonymous.
50:41
Uh So let's kick it off to the first question.
50:43
Let's do it.
50:44
All right.
50:45
This one's for all of you guys.
50:46
All right.
50:47
What's good?
50:48
My guys, your boys turning 21 in a few weeks and was asking what
50:51
I should do for my birthday.
50:53
I don't wanna do the stereotypical thing of going to Vegas
50:55
and I also talked to my girl about me going out and she said she
50:58
was a little upset that she can't go with me but I think she will
51:01
get over it.
51:02
Should I be worried about that or should I take her word for
51:05
it?
51:05
Should he go out to Vegas?
51:07
Yeah.
51:08
Yeah, I mean, hey, my guy go out to tell her to give, give you
51:13
your balls back.
51:15
Go to Vegas, Mike.
51:16
What's wrong with you?
51:17
First of all the fact that you're asking for permission at
51:19
21 shit, you should have seen me at 21.
51:22
I'm out.
51:23
Bye.
51:26
Come on 21.
51:27
I mean how did you know how does she?
51:29
I don't know like I, I feel like I feel like it's healthy sometimes
51:32
to like want to celebrate your birthday without your significant
51:35
other like and and for her birthday, she should do the same
51:37
thing.
51:38
Just hang out with her girl.
51:39
So let let him have his time and then you have your time, right
51:43
But, but I tell you the times I hung out with my girl in my 21 in
51:48
my twenties, it was the worst experience.
51:52
Well, that's because it becomes like a romantic thing.
51:54
You know what I mean?
51:55
You can't get too messed up because then they're like the police
51:57
the front police like you, you're taking shots like yo you
52:00
already get all messed with your shirts coming on and she's
52:02
in your ear like man, that's a lot of shots, babe.
52:05
That's like, dude, there's nothing worse.
52:08
You here right now, my ear, there's nothing worse than planning
52:11
to hang out with your boys.
52:12
And then that one dude shows up with his girl and you're like
52:14
oh dude, that is, I tell you, you don't wanna be that guy, that
52:19
guy.
52:19
I've been that girl.
52:20
That, no, go, she's fun.
52:22
She's fun.
52:23
So much fun.
52:23
You're like, oh and she's like, I'm like one of the guys.
52:26
I'm like, no, you're not, you are not like us.
52:29
You do not want to talk about the things that we talk about.
52:31
You don't want to see the pictures that I have on my phone.
52:33
All right, get out of here.
52:34
You are here now.
52:35
We cannot cut for each other because you are here now.
52:39
Like I feel like I've been that girl where it's like girls are
52:41
like, yeah, we're gonna have a girls night out and then I'll
52:42
bring my man and they're like, why did you do that?
52:44
I'm like, oh, I'm sorry.
52:46
Yeah.
52:46
Yeah.
52:47
Yeah, he's go to the girls.
52:48
Absolutely not.
52:48
Absolutely not.
52:49
I think that it is healthy to have girl time and boy time separate
52:53
but definitely going have that experience at 21 and if it was
52:59
her birthday, her go to Vegas, her have a girl like you know
53:01
what I'm saying?
53:02
Like that's my advice and girls, I mean, oh my God, I can already
53:05
tell what he's going to go through, he's going to go to Vegas
53:07
he's going to have fun and then she's gonna blow it up his song
53:09
Have a good night.
53:10
She's gonna have that text at two in the morning.
53:12
You know what, forget it.
53:13
Have a good night.
53:14
All right.
53:15
And it's like, oh now you gotta, you gotta be at the strip club
53:18
looking at that text like, oh God, here we go.
53:21
Ok?
53:22
You just thinking about that or you out with your boys having
53:24
a good time and then this text comes in.
53:26
This is my favorite one I haven't heard from you.
53:28
I hope you're OK.
53:31
No, I'm OK.
53:32
Yeah.
53:32
Yeah.
53:33
Exactly.
53:33
What if I'm not.
53:34
Ok.
53:34
What are you gonna, what are you Liam Neeson?
53:35
You gonna come save me like maybe, maybe I would maybe I maybe
53:42
I was or maybe oh that girl look, I'm not.
53:48
If we already been in a relationship for a very long period
53:52
of time, then I worry, you know.
53:55
No, all you need to do is I'm gonna go hang out with my boys.
53:58
All right, cool.
53:58
And then just text me in the morning but it's not.
54:01
All right cool.
54:03
I'm gonna go hang out boys.
54:04
What are you?
54:04
What are you guys gonna do?
54:06
No, I don't ask those questions anymore because like you guys
54:09
want us to check for what?
54:11
For what?
54:13
But the thing is that this is a funny thing like it's always
54:15
like it seems like it's one way but like girls get those text
54:18
messages too.
54:19
Absolutely.
54:21
Absolutely.
54:22
Like, oh, what y'all about to be doing?
54:24
What you about to be doing?
54:29
Wait, hold on, you.
54:31
You're gonna go hang out with, with, with Alexandre.
54:33
Who is that girl that she did?
54:35
She stay breaking, breaking up, you know her man.
54:38
I, I agree with you.
54:40
A lot of dudes that do the same shit.
54:42
You got a room with her though.
54:43
You gonna be in your relationship like me and my wife and my
54:48
wife, we have separate like she'll go out with her girls.
54:50
I go out my dudes right now.
54:51
This is the difference.
54:52
Like I'll go out, I get those texts.
54:55
Wait, wait, what time are you going?
54:56
I can't, I can't go to sleep without you.
54:58
Here she goes out with her.
55:01
She'll come home, I'm out cold in bed.
55:03
You just went to bed.
55:04
Yeah, I was tired.
55:05
That's what you said you were cool.
55:08
I remember I used to, I used to hate getting those text message
55:10
like you're going out when they're super cool like oh cool
55:14
and you're like, all right, you guys are out.
55:15
OK?
55:15
Cool.
55:16
You guys are drinking having a good time.
55:17
All right, it's fun.
55:18
You check in.
55:18
All right later bye babe.
55:19
And then they hit you with this paragraph.
55:21
I just wanna let you know.
55:21
You're amazing.
55:23
I love you.
55:23
So you're like, I don't got time to read this paragraph at a
55:26
strip club right now and I got in my face and shaking anyways
55:29
but have fun, dude.
55:30
Have fun at 21 in Vegas.
55:31
Yeah.
55:32
Fun.
55:33
That was a episode.
55:34
It was, yeah, it was a wild episode.
55:36
So thank you guys for watching, tuning in.
55:39
And if you saw something you like again, subscribe and tell
55:42
your friends and share and like, yes, we love you guys too.
55:47
Make sure you share.
55:48
Tell your friends till next time.
55:49
Peace out.